Chapter 148: Entering the Dungeon?!

Standing in front of a beautiful silver gateway, was a six-meter tall Ancient Minotaur. He was holding a massive, double-sided, golden battleaxe.

All throughout the extremely spacious room, were bloody corpses and carcasses from various magical-beasts and humanoids. Hanging from the ceiling were six emaciated Human women, who were dressed in dirty rags and crying their eyes out.

They were desperate for salvation, but had clearly already given up all hope. In each of their iron bird-cages was a large, golden chest, and around each of their necks was the silver key which could open them.

The ceiling was surprisingly well-lit for a tomb, and there were six conveniently placed, obsidian pillars around the chamber. Almost as if the creators of the Dungeon had the intention of giving adventurers a chance to survive the Boss’ ‘Fiery Whirlwind Axe’ attack.

Devouring those carcasses were a wide variety of low-level, rank-G, giant flies, cockroaches, rats, and even some Goblins. They weren’t part of the ‘fight,’ but served more for the ambiance.

All of that pristine marble was covered with either dust, blood, gore or other manner of filth. Thus, it appeared more like a den of monsters, rather than the tomb of a princess.

Suddenly, all of the critters began shrieking, screeching, hissing, and hiding. A sinister smile appeared on that black-furred bull’s face, as the large septum ring was slightly lifted up by a loud and fiery snort.

He growled “Hmm~, seems like some small-fry have come to play…” in a deep and terrifying voice. It was at that time when a group of seven ‘brave’ adventurers almost entered into the chamber.

There was a loud wolf howl, followed by high-pitched shouting, “Nyah~! Ow-ow-ow-meow~! Owy~, Lina~, I’ve got a boo-boo~! Kiss it and make it better~…”

Then a man complained “Oi, stop fucking up the goddamn entrance! Shit! Cut! Can we do another take? I gotta piss again, and the dumbass landed in a puddle of… what I assume is cow intestines? Anyway, she’s gonna need a new set of clothes.”

Karian sighed dramatically, and Johnny announced “Ugh, fine, whatever! Hey, clean up the damn stairs, that’s obviously a safety hazard… I really miss the days when people would just come here and try to beat the Bosses without dying.” They didn’t even make it inside of the room and they already had to do another take…
“Hmm~, seems like some small-fry have come to play…” After saying his line rather unenthusiastically, the Minotaur lifted up his battleaxe with both hands and glared at the entrance, while praying that everything would go smoothly.

Walking into the chamber first was a large bright-green, Quad-Tailed Nature-Fox. On her back was a white-haired and furred cat-girl, with pale skin. Jasmine had fallen so many times, that they decided to make her ride down the stairs on Inari’s back.

They also learned that skirts were a bad idea with her, so they settled on jean-shorts and a black tank-top. Both herself and Elina were forced to wear bras, for obvious reasons.

Alice was given a thick, red, flame-retardant, mage’s robe, but was wearing nearly indestructible black underwear as well: just in case. The Elementalist didn’t buy a weapon, but Jasmine did.

Holstered on each side of her waist was a “.38 Caliber Snub-Nose Revolver: +30 Attack rating, +2 Agility, +2 Dexterity. Can hold six rounds at a time. Baseline maximum effective range is 100 meters. Rare Quality, requires level-10 to use.”

It obviously wasn’t nearly as good as a ‘drop’ or something from a Battleground vendor, because it wasn’t Soulbound. She ‘could’ equip it, but Michael told her not to. They were only temporary and since he spent a whole twenty-five gold on each of them, he didn’t want them to go to waste later on. Perhaps he could sell them to some medieval Human King for a ridiculous price, or make one of his undead ‘children’ into a Gunslinger eventually.

Fortunately, they didn’t need to buy ammo, because Jasmine had the ‘Blood Bullet’ spell. In fact, because she was forced by him to keep using that painful and dangerous ability, her proficiency in it increased by a lot.

“Blood Bullet Level 3: Sacrifices the caster’s life-force to create three projectiles, out of hardened, chaotic blood, which curses the enemy upon contact. Possible curses include: Hallucination, Fear, Paralysis, Arousal, Paranoia, Hate, Fury, Silence and Dyslexia. Damage is based on the Aura stat. Range is depended on the Agility stat. Costs three points of Health.”

She stored them inside of her inventory, but it was impossible to send the bullets directly into the pistols. However, it was still incredibly convenient that she could keep over three-hundred .38 caliber rounds inside of her bag, instead of needing to place them all over her clothing: in easy-to-reach places.

Talia did the same thing with her ‘Ironwood Arrows,’ though she was able to create a few thousand in the same amount of time. Arrows of Wind were different, since they were meant to be ephemeral, so she wasn’t allowed to store them inside of her bag-slots.

With the ability to create magical projectiles, it was strange that anyone would use the old-fashioned kind. Essentially, most people didn’t have the amount of Aura required for their bullets, arrows and bolts to become very powerful.

Gunsmithing and Fletching Professions, as they leveled-up and with access to the proper materials, could manufacture ammo that did more damage than the actual weapons. They would also travel farther, have specific effects, and were generally preferable.

However, Michael’s mentality was “Don’t waste money on low-level shit, just so you can pull ahead a little in the DPS-meters! If you want em, make em yourselves! Crafting for the win!” That was also the main reason he preferred magical ranged attacks and his reusable Arcane throwing weapons.

To avoid another spontaneous orgy, he had decided not to use ‘Asura’s Embrace’ and ‘Darkening.’ In fact, he didn’t even use ‘Lightening,’ since being heavier was actually better. The angelic wings ‘looked cool’ though, so he obviously kept using those.

Sarah wanted to simply enter inside with all of her armor ‘activated’ and look like a skull-faced, bony-armed, undead monster. Yet, she was unhappily wearing high-heels, an asymmetrical skirt, bright-blue gloves, a corset, that hooded mantle, and a mysterious veil.

On the other hand, Michael was already clad in metallic-white greaves and boots, with a silver gauntlet covering his left hand, and chains of light going up his arm. The right was wearing a beautiful, crystalline gauntlet, which turned into a glossy, transparent material after the elbow. His breastplate was glowing, along with his illusory thigh-armor. An Arcane Orb, and two dice floated a few meters above and behind his head.

That gargantuan siegeblade was resting against his right shoulder, as if it was actually heavy. Then there was the terrified, angelic cat-girl, who was hiding behind his back and nervously clutching an unadorned white-pole against her chest.

Rather than being afraid of the Minotaur, she was simply being camera-shy and having stage-fright. Talia was still wearing the same bright-green blouse and skirt, with comfortable and relatively stylish boots.

Entering the room, Michael indifferently glanced up at the Human women who were screaming for help, and muttered “These bitches are actually pretty damn professional. Hell, this is the thirteenth fucking take, and they’re still actin like it’s the first time they’ve seen us, hehe~.”

The Huntress whispered “Stop talking to yourself, or you’re going to ruin everything again!” Aside from her, everyone else had already made plenty of ridiculous mistakes and forced them to spend a whole hour just trying to make it into the chamber.

As the seven of them were standing there, their group seemed truly strange. With a three-meter tall dragon-woman, as their mage, towering over the rest of the party. Even Talia was six inches taller than Michael, but he still walked out in front of everyone else and did seem rather imposing.

Those crimson eyes glared at the Minotaur, as an invisible barrier suddenly appeared, blocking the entrance off. The Boss-Battle had finally been initiated, and Karian was able to say his lines. “Moo~ huhuhuhuhu~! Welcome, brave adventurers! I fear that you are all quite inexperienced, so I shall have to ‘teach’ you… what true power looks like!”

Then the adorable cat-girl hopped off the back of that pony-sized fox, “Nyahahahaha~! Tis I; the bringer of death and damnation! The ruler of the underworld! The great and terrible, Jasmine Jade! Die for me, pathetic mortals, die~!” After that, she started rapidly firing her pistols around the room and slaughtering all of the random trash-mobs.

At that point, Karian roared “No, I don’t even care anymore! We aren’t doing another fucking take! I’m just going to slaughter all of you annoying assholes!”

Michael shouted “Final-fucking-lee! Goddamn it, enough of this showy bullshit! Hahahahaha~! Get it? Bullshit… cause you’re a Minotaur! Sigh~, let’s go kill the Boss now guys…”

53 thoughts on “Chapter 148: Entering the Dungeon?!

  1. Entering the room, Michael indifferently glanced up at the Human women who were screaming for help, and muttered “These bitches are actually pretty damn professional. Hell, this is the thirteenth fucking take, and they’re still actin like it’s the first time they’ve seen us, hehe~.”

    so fucking hilarious i just can’t stop laugh at this…LOL they just despair as fuck ~_~

    fuck this chapter realy funny

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  2. Gives Jasmine a scoped FN FAL because she needs a long gun with some power.
    Personally the only thing I want to see is the progress. All the characters are crazy in their own little way, and that makes this funny.

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    • At the moment she’s a ‘Gunslinger’ which implies that she mainly uses short to midranged pistols. However, Classes change, and shit happens lol. She ‘could’ potentially use longer ranged weapons. Hell, she could also strangle a Human child to death, with her tiny Dwarven hands lol. Michael used a rock to kill things for at least 20+ chapters rofl.

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  3. Is Michaels love interests only going to be revolved around his companions and when i say love intrest i mean is he only gonna bang his companions, like no action on the side this is a fantasy world use it to the fullest, cause i can see this story to be long and glorious but sex with the same people might get a bit stail honestly…. for some reason im jealous for Michael and i want him to bang lily now instead of Azrael who is most likely an SS boss, cmon lets get a threesome with the hot sisters, (Banging 2 hot sisters….every fucking guys dream…that will most likely never ever happen….ever..sigh…my gf sister is hot)

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    • Well, if you wanna have a three-way with your girlfriend and her sister, it doesn’t really have any bearing on the story lol I’ve already stated Michael’s personal preferences… He would definitely settle for one girl, as long as she could keep up with his ridiculous sex-drive, but he ended up having feelings for both Sarah and Elina at the same time. Instead of being a pussy about it, he decided to go for both of them lol. Then, Elina brought Jasmine into the mix, and there’s still three other girls that are in the party but not fucking anyone. Inari is too young, and basically a literal fox, Alice is unknown atm, and Talia is still managing to maintain her chastity lol. You think that 7 people isn’t enough? A relationship with 2 humans is already complicated enough imo, and more than 7 inhuman Companions is way too much.

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      • Exactly lol, well, a lot of those effects wouldn’t work on a Dungeon Boss. Not that she could even really do any damage atm. Her Sundering Beam could lower his Defense Rating though, but probably not enough to make her attacks do any damage.

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    • I’m sticking with a maximum of 2 trinkets, 1 throwing weapon, 1 two handed weapon or 1 main-hand and 1 off hand lol. As for people with more than 2 arms, they probably follow different rules… For example, if he used his spell, it would be possible to use 2 2-handed weapons, or 4 one-handed weapons? lol

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      • I would say it is 50:50.
        He may have 2 more arms but that does not mean that his hand eye coordination improves and adapts for four arms.
        Have you ever fired 2 pistols at once, a 2 inch grouping at 5 yards can grow to a 2 feet grouping when you use two pistols because your mind is set to do one task at a time. I think he would be able to use the siegeblade and his ranged weapon with better efficiency, or equip a shield.

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      • Yeah, if he was a Human in our world, then that might be a factor. However, lets just consider 3 Dexterity as the amount required for a person to be able to play all kinds of complicated shit on the piano(Both hands obviously lol) Also, higher Dexterity helps with multi-casting, casting speed, casting without chanting, and other such things. Since his Dexterity is already far beyond the superhuman level, then growing two wings and two new arms, wouldn’t be nearly as difficult to deal with. The biggest issue has more to do with fairness in stats lmao.

        For example, wouldn’t someone capable of equipping 4 weapons, have way more stats than someone with only 2 or 1? lol Not sure how to deal with that yet… Maybe the stats will be added together and divided by 2. Like if you have 1 epic lvl 10 sword and 1 rare lvl 10 sword in the other left hand, then the stats would actually be lower than if you just had 1 weapon lol.

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  4. >Hallucination, Fear, Paralysis, Arousal, Paranoia, Hate, Fury, Silence and Dyslexia.

    OK. That last one is just petty harassment. Chaos is great. She can’t even decide to keep battle skills as just battle skills.

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