Okay, I know, you don’t have to say it.  I should have just shot it in the head and saved Mei from suffering so much.  Then I also wouldn’t have been so pissed off that I used spectral cockroaches in order to torment the cute, vicious and gigantic, doggy to death.  Well, in the end, I didn’t even get to finish the fucker off.  Granny Arin came over and crushed his already mutilated head with her warhammer.

Almost at the same exact time, there were five or six explosions to our left and right.  Liara slowly limped back to us, before coughing out a bunch of blood, while Johan seemed to be in much better shape.  There was a giant claw mark across his back, but aside from that, he was totally fine.

I asked “Wasn’t this supposed to be a relatively ‘safe’ and ‘easy’ mission?  How much farther is it until we can get into position?  If we run into a few more packs like that… And there’s probably much stronger bastards the higher we go on this damned mountain.”

As Mei shoved her breasts back inside of her robe and struggled to walk over to me, I reached my whole arm into my extradimensional pouch.  Then I pulled a wine bottle out and removed the lid.  She grabbed the whole damn bottle and started guzzling at least five ounces before I quickly took it back from her.  “For fuck’s sake, it’s not like we had an unlimited supply of this shit!  Besides, it’s not good to take too much of this kinda stuff!”

She totally ignored me and turned towards Granny Arin, who was answering my earlier questions.  “Kid, there are no ‘safe’ or ‘easy’ missions.  That’s all just a trick to keep moral from falling into oblivion.  Aside from you, the rest of us are expendable.  Anyway, it’s not that much farther now… We definitely aren’t going all the way up to the peak, so hopefully… Hopefully we won’t encounter too many more problems.  Ugh, I was enjoying my retirement before this insanity started!  I’m way too old to still be doing-”

Before she could finish speaking, I interjected “Stop!  Don’t say it!  That’s like the most dangerous flag you can raise!  Let’s just hurry up and get up there…” 

However, unlike those Silver Wolves from before, Rank-E Beasts were way too valuable to simply leave to rot.  Part of the reason why Liara and Johan took so long was because they had already butchered their doggies.  The most important parts were the Dantian, liver, heart, teeth, and a few choice cuts of steak.

Mei and I didn’t really participate, since we would have only gotten in the way and slowed the other three down.  They swiftly stripped all the valuable ingredients away and the Ginger Giant stored everything in his special Extradimensional Backpack.  It was a Rank-E item specifically designed to hold and store large amounts of perishable foodstuffs.

As we were slowly walking up the never-ending hill, Johan told me “Before the invasion, I was visiting my family on Dublin Island… Out of nowhere, these black-skinned assholes with crimson tattoos all over their bodies started attacking our village.  Most of them were only Novices, but there were just too many of the little fuckers.  I managed to protect my wife and kids, but my sister, brothers, parents… The reason I’m telling you this, is because I know you’re definitely gonna be important one day.  I probably won’t be alive when that time comes, so do me a favor, okay?  Retake Dublin for me… Even if it’s a hundred years from now.”

The reason why it was taking us so damn long to climb that mountain was because we weren’t just going straight up.  From the base to the peak, it was probably only around a mile, but there were spots that were steeper than others.  We probably circled completely around the thing like five or six times, either trying to avoid cannonfire, dangerous Beasts or harsher terrain.  At some points we actually needed to scale huge trees and walk across the branches, in order to get past random drops.  

There were tons of massive holes all over the place… A thick black smog was constantly billowing into the sky from those ominous pits, but it wasn’t hot or volcanic.  Granny Arin warned me “Don’t touch that shit.  It’s concentrated Death Qi.  Similar to Yin Qi, but instead of just freezing your hand, it’ll literally drain the life from you.  Well, if you practice a Cultivation Method that deals with the Darkness Element, then maybe you could get some benefits from a place like this… But if you don’t, then it’ll make you sick or even kill you.  This fucking mountain is especially toxic for Liara and me, since the Cultivation Methods of our ‘Miami Island’ focus on Elemental Light and absorbing the Yang Qi from the bodies of men.”

“Ah, I thought you guys were just sluts… So there’s actually a legitimate reason for having daily gangbangs?” The five of us were taking a short break, since well, Johan had to take a shit, while the rest of us were on the verge of pissing ourselves.  Obviously we all took several pit-stops before then too, which was part of the reason why we were only about halfway to our destination.

Liara chuckled, explaining “Nah, we’re probably sluts or whores by the standards of most other Islands… But in Miami it’s different.  You see, back in the olden days, before the Church of Luna came to the Southern Islands, Miami used to be known as a military ‘comfort station’.  It was before Hua Jiang unified the Southern Islands, so there were constant territorial disputes.  Since our people were relatively weak, we managed to stay out of the wars and bloodshed by… Well, our ancestors were basically prostitutes.  No, there were times when they were more like sex-slaves, since they didn’t really have a choice in the matter.  For centuries, even Adepts and Experts who came from our Island would be forced to ‘service’ practically anyone who came by.  It was pretty fucked up, but still… They endured the ridicule and abuse, in order to survive that shitty era and allow their descendants to live a better life.”

Although I really wanted to make some jokes about Miami, none of them would have understood the reference.  Besides, I couldn’t exactly say “Well, there was a city in my old world with the same name.”  It would have been pretty rude anyway.

After she came back from pissing on a giant tree, Granny Arin continued Liara’s history lesson.  “My great grandmother used to tell me about how a lot of our ‘traditions’ began.  The men and women from Miami were originally from a continent to the far west.  I don’t know what it was called, but all the people there had dark brown skin, really curly black hair and a lot smaller.  Even the cultivators were skinny and lanky, with little muscle mass.  Some of them were tall, others were really short.  However, over the generations of mixing our bloodlines with the giants of the Hua family, most of us ended up being like this.  The reason that we don’t have surnames is because we don’t raise our own children.  After we give birth, our kids go to the various group homes within Miami City and live there until they become adults.”

Mei was standing next to me, as she asked “How can you just leave your children with strangers and never see them again?!”

Liara snickered, “They aren’t ‘strangers’… I’m kinda surprised that you don’t know anything about Miami.  You were a princess, right?  Didn’t you ever learn the history of the Southern Islands in school?”

“I did… But there are so many islands, how can you expect me to know every little thing about each of them?!” Mei crossed her arms in front of her chest and started scowling at the beefy mostly-naked giantess.

Granny Arin sighed dramatically, then told us “In order to become a Father or Mother, you need to be an Adept at the very least.  Each group home only has one of each.  It’s a highly exalted position in our homeland.  Their job is to raise children in a happy and comfortable environment.  Give them counseling and guidance… Raise them to be adults.  When we become older and have children of our own; our Fathers and Mothers are the ones who raise them.  Of course, there are plenty of other instances where we allow friends and siblings who are the Father or Mother of a group home to raise our kids.  There are some people who prefer to leave it up to fate and pick a random place.”

“Were either of you ever a ‘Mother’ before?” The moment I asked that question, the two of them seemed super-depressed.

Then Liara grumbled “It’s not like I’ve never wanted to be one, but neither of us meet the ‘qualifications’.  I’ve had at least ten babies… I’ve never met them since the day they were born though.  The ironclad rule is that Mothers and Fathers need to be virgins when they first start.  It doesn’t matter once they retire and become Grandmothers or Grandfathers.  However, while they’re working as Parental Guardians, they’re only allowed to fuck each other.”

Mei complained “Why would you even want to live in a place like that?  So many stupid rules… Why don’t you just leave and raise your kids however you want?  Who’s going to stop you?”

“It’s not like we were forced… When I got pregnant for the first time, I was fifteen.  It was only a year after my coming of age ceremony and I didn’t have enough talent to be accepted by any Sects, so I went into the Hua Jiang Navy.  Even if I wanted to raise my own child, I wouldn’t have had the time or resources to give them a good life.  I don’t think you understand… We don’t have any ‘commoners’, ‘nobles’ or ‘royals’ in Miami.  Everyone does their own thing, most leave for other islands right away.  We all give whatever money we can spare, back to our roots though.  That way, all of our children are supported better than most royal brats.  It works for us… Besides, most of our people are either prostitutes or soldiers.  The lucky ones get to go off to a Sect or get adopted by a prominent Family, in order to proceed down the path of cultivation much more easily.” Granny Arin had a wry smile on her wrinkled and scarred face, as she vacantly gazed off towards the distant ocean.  When I followed her gaze, I noticed that Thoth was almost below the horizon and seemed larger than usual.