“Sir, we’ve just picked up another mana-spike! It seems to be in coming from the Baltimore Maryland area again!” A short and feminine man shouted; he had long black hair pulled back into a ponytail, tan skin, and was standing next to a giant. That two-meter tall woman had scars all over her face and a shaved head.
However, the two of them were wearing similar attire: A white tank-top and black jeans. There was a tattoo on the back of their left hands, of the number ‘777’ with a circle around it.
Reclining on a comfortable leather office chair, was a man who seemed to be in his twenties. He was muscular, had blonde hair, blue eyes, and skin so white that he could certainly pass for a vampire.
His physical features were relatively masculine and he even had a light beard. He smiled wryly at Kelsey King and ordered “Bring Iris here, I need to have a little ‘chat’ with her. Lee, I’ve told you this a thousand times, but I’m a psychic too… I’m just as sensitive to mana as you are, probably more. I knew it from the moment that first spike hit; I just thought we’d have centuries or at least decades to prepare… It’s only been five years since I had that premonition and we aren’t even slightly ready. Our secret lair is literally your disgustingly rich parent’s second mansion… If it wasn’t so hard for veterans to get jobs now days, there’s no way we’d be able to establish our army of like, I don’t know, how many?”
“We currently have five-hundred employees at the moment, Sir. Not including the bounty hunters and mercenaries… Luke, I hate to be a downer and all, but I honestly don’t understand how we can possibly resist something like ‘that’. You’re the most powerful Psycher I’ve ever met or even heard of in recent history… but you had a seizure when you microwaved that guy last time.” The young asian man’s name was actually Philip James Tyler, but Lee was his name in most MMORPGs he played.
An extremely irritated red-headed girl suddenly entered the small office and growled “What the fuck do you want?!” She had gigantic breasts, which were moving around freely within a loose white t-shirt and she was wearing nothing but thin black yoga-shorts on the lower half of her body. Of course, her face was still extremely bruised and it wasn’t as if those molars were going to grow back. A broken nose, shattered right eye socket, and there were also plenty of nasty gashes on her cheeks; regardless of how terrible her injuries were, she was still able to walk and talk perfectly fine.
Luke sighed, removing his metal prosthetic legs from his huge desk and asked “Iris, I know that menstruation for psychics is rough, but you don’t have be so belligerent. You should really go to a dentist and probably a hospital. Lee, why didn’t you at least give her one of your ‘Yin Yang’ acupuncture therapy treatments?”
Philip coughed a few times and frowned, walking over to the ‘Admiral’ and whispering “Um, ‘Sir’, I don’t actually know how to do acupuncture… That’s just what I call anal sex.”
Kelsey facepalmed, muttering “If it wasn’t so hard to get a job as an ex-con, I never would’ve agreed to work for these idiots… Maybe I could go back to being a janitor?”
Iris shouted “I’m fine! I heal pretty quickly… Well, except for the missing fucking teeth! How the hell was I supposed to know that you bastards were trying to help me that time?! Ya should’ve at least given me some kinda warning!” Then she suddenly started choking on her own saliva; for at least six whole minutes, the two men and one woman were watching her cough and struggle to not pass-out.
When she could finally breathe again, Luke chuckled, asking “Are you gonna live?” However, his expression turned from a smile, into a scowl almost instantly.
The ginger seemed terrified, as her whole body trembled. “It’s coming… something horrible. There was so much death… I’ve never had a premonition this strong before! You really weren’t kidding about all this apocalypse bullshit!”
Commander King frowned, “Admiral, it’s pretty fucking obvious where this bastard is, so why don’t we just… ya know, kill em? Whatever they are, they’ll probably just be getting stronger as time goes on, so it’s better to murder the freak before he or she reaches-”
“Nope~! Not gonna happen! That thing… isn’t human. Well, neither are you, but I still love you anyway. What I meant to say was: It’s like, some kind of super-overpowered armageddon monster! We need way more than just five-hundred mostly-crippled military vets, and the four of us…” Luke was fairly agitated, as he interrupted Kelsey. Once he calmed down a bit, he gazed into her hazel eyes and asked “Do you still have those contacts with your ‘people’? Ah, that sounded kinda racist; I didn’t mean black people, okay?”
She facepalmed again, grumbling “I really don’t think it’s a good idea to get involved with werewolves… but I ‘can’ call my old pack and tell them to start a riot in Baltimore. They can just pretend to be protesters for that stupid-ass drug-dealer that got shot the other day… Umm, nope, can’t remember his name, but he was a killed by a white cop, so it shouldn’t be hard to cause a little chaos.”
Lee complained “That sounds like a terrible idea and what would that even accomplish?”
Kelsey smirked, revealing “Right now, we’re the only ones who even know about this asshole, right? Well, if there’s a lot of news coverage and controversy in the city that bastard’s staying in, then we can draw more attention towards the weird-ass bullshit that’ll be happening soon. Why the hell should we have to sacrifice our own people just to go after this monster? We can spread some rumors online about a government weather-weapon, or global warming, and get as many dumbasses as possible noticing the unnatural disasters… Even if we can’t stop whatever’s coming, we can at least make sure that the ‘real’ powers out there test the waters for us. Meanwhile, I vote that we get as far away from Maryland as possible… Florida really isn’t gonna cut it.”
Iris blankly stared up at the scar-faced Commander for a few moments, before asking “What the fuck? Since when were werewolves real?! Can you transform into a giant dog-monster or something?”
The giantess frowned, “My ancestors were supposedly able to shapeshift, but as far as I know, that’s just some fairytale bullshit. During a Full Moon, we get stronger, faster, and crazier than usual… It’s probably just a genetic psychological disorder, cause aside from growing facial and body hair abnormally, everything else can ‘barely’ be considered ‘supernatural’.”
Luke grinned, “So, where did you guys wanna go? I’ve got some family in Alaska, Lee’s cousin is a famous voice actress in Japan and super-hot, Australia’s nice pretty much all year round…”
Philip sighed, suggesting “Admiral, we should probably continue to ‘collect’ Psychers and I still believe that vampires exist. If they have even half the crazy powers that the ones in fiction do, then they should be a huge boost to our war potential. By the way, we never did find those ‘Gator-Shamans’ we came to Florida in search of… We know for a fact that Witches exist, but most of them are just regular Psychers who form groups to amplify their abilities. Then there’s those monks in China; that guy who swam across the Pacific ocean is most likely some sort of ‘fishman’…”
Iris started laughing hysterically and mentioned “I might know a ‘Wizard’… He’s a fifty year old virgin, who somehow gained pyrokinesis a while back; he lives in Cali and pretends to be a superhero. There was a magician in Vegas who seemed pretty legit too… No idea if she’s the real deal though.”
Kelsey complained “Luke, I know how much you love all this supernatural bullshit, but I don’t think we should be wasting our time hunting down things that might not even exist… Have you forgotten about Norway already? Three fucking months, totally wasted, trying to find some goddamn giant troll monsters…”
He chuckled, “They were real though! Just… not quite as impressive as I expected them to be. Anyway, from now on, we won’t screw around with sasquatches, yetis, bigfoots and dinosaurs! It’s not that they aren’t out there… They’re just kinda useless if they don’t have any kind of ‘power’.”