I almost wet the bed last night, because my legs hurt so much that I could barely move. In other news, Inari really doesn’t like to stay on my nightstand! Seriously, maybe it’s not the figurine? I think there might just be an invisible little monster… No, nope, I don’t want to think about that possibility.

Okay, so tonight, I’m going to try placing the fox inside of my nightstand drawer. If it can still jump out of there, then I don’t even know what to do about that level of weirdness.

Aside from that, my parents are planning on going to Japan tomorrow. They’re afraid Baba and Jiji won’t be able to handle the news of Azra’s death… They wanted to go immediately, but they were afraid of leaving me alone.

Why can’t I go with them? Well, I don’t actually have a passport, so~… Yeah, I’ve never left the States before and never really wanted to until recently. Now I can’t, even though I want to go with them. It’s fine though, I’m not suicidal or crazy. My brother died and it was my fault, but I’m still alive. He wouldn’t have wanted me to keep crying about him forever and I don’t think I ‘can’ keep feeling so terrible all the time either.

From now on, I’m going to live life to the fullest! I’ll make sure that his sacrifice wasn’t in vain! I’m going to binge watch all fifteen seasons of “My Little Sister Has Cat-Ears” and hopefully by then, my legs will work again!

***

Oh wow! I totally just saw her jump! There was no wind, no vibrations, nothing! Inari scooted across my desk and fell onto the carpet! I even screamed “What do you want from me?!” and my parents yelled at me to be quiet. No, I didn’t tell them about the ghost… Do you want me to be committed? At the very least, they might make me go see a psychiatrist or psychotherapist.

I’m kind of afraid to touch her now though. What if there’s like, a giant spider underneath or a bunch of ants? Maybe I’ll be cursed if I pick her up? Actually, what if I have dissociative personality disorder? It could be that one of my personalities is tricking the other one into thinking… No, I’m just going to stop this line of craziness right now!

Welp, I picked it up and put it back on the desk and nothin happened. Wait, I just heard something… Like really quiet whimpering. Ah, never mind, the neighbor’s dog is barking outside.

“Goodnight Inari, please stop freaking me out, okay? Alright, I’m glad we’ve come to an agreement. If you want to be on the floor so badly, I can leave you there, you know?” Now I’m talking to a possibly haunted figurine, so I’m definitely not insane. This is totally normal and acceptable behavior. Geez, I’m really glad that no one else is ever going to read this nonsense.

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