HCL Chapter 116: Minari’s Fancy Cape

“Hey Kana, I consider us friends… So I’ll give you a ‘friendly’ warning.” Minari suddenly turned around and grabbed the ethereal woman’s delicate neck, “If you ever try to fucking manipulate me into killing my loved ones again, I will destroy you. And I don’t mean the funny, ‘haha’, kind of destruction either! This you right now… You’re just a fancy goddamn cape! And I like you that way. You’re useful and nice, plus, I can do all~ kinds of fun things with you, hehehehe~! So unless you plan on staying that way forever, I would suggest that you not make the same mistake again.”

Then she let go and giggled, casually mentioning “On the other hand~, I did kinda-sorta create you and then force you to trick me. In as sense, I’m like your God in a lotta ways. I’d prefer if you called me Daddy though, or Mommy.”

Arcana frowned, murmuring “I would rather not.” Then she was sucked into those pure-white wings and turned them pitch-black. There were all sorts of galaxies, nebulae and other astronomical phenomena floating around in those massive wings.

After that, runic tattoos appeared all over Minari’s tanning skin, as she suddenly began equipping all of her gear. Chaotic Embrace spread across her hands and arms, covering them with demonic purple armor. Bone-like spikes jutted out of the knuckes and shoulders. The fingernails of the gauntlets were extremely long, thick and sharp, like the talons of a raptor.

She wore both of Jasmine’s underwear, in order to shrink her breasts down to nothing and totally protect her other genitals. Then her scaly draconic legs were swiftly covered by a golden liquid, which hardened into a secondary metallic skin. A shadowy black latex-like material appeared across her groin and tail. Meanwhile, thick glowing white breastplate materialized, which outlined her abdominal and pectoral muscles.

Minari’s whole head was immediately covered by a thick inky fog, before it solidified into the form of a skull mask and six massive tendrils. Although it wasn’t necessarily ‘air-tight’, the Worldly Goddess had already reached the point where she didn’t need to worry about that anymore. Aside from the fact that breathing was no longer necessary, the cold, radiation and vacuum that would all be able to kill a human, didn’t even make her uncomfortable.

“Hohohoho~, it’s been a while… Rapture.” As that soft and feminine voice entered her mind, Minari was pulled directly out of that ‘tiny’ bead. She was floating in space like before, but the solar system was an unfamiliar one. There were seven planets orbiting a small pink sun. However, that star’s light paled in comparison to the massive golden nine-tailed fox that was smiling at the minuscule woman.

“Hey there Sariel~, hehehe~! I almost didn’t recognize you… Okay, that’s a lie. I knew that this was going to happen. I basically wrote the fucking scenario that’s playing out right now.” Minari flapped her wings and released a decent amount of air from them, in order to propel her body forward, towards a nearby asteroid. After landing, she pulled a metal folding chair out of her Soul Realm and sat down.

The celestial fox telepathically inquired “Why would you write yourself talking about writing what’s happening?”

“I don’t fucking know?! It was a long time ago!” Minari pulled out a huge wooden recurve bow and began firing arrows randomly at the distant planets. Of course, even though they were traveling a hundred miles per second, it seemed like they were moving in slow motion from her perspective.

“Hohoho~, but you’re a Worldly Deity now… Remembering a few hundred or thousand years in perfect clarity should be a simple matter, Rapture.” Sariel was slowly moving her legs, as if she was ‘dog paddling’ through the void.

“Bullshit! It ain’t like I was even using this body at the time, right?! I only remember bits and pieces from my soul memory… It’s all in there somewhere, but I can’t access it yet. Not that I want to though. Remembering the past is fine, but if you already know how a story is gonna play out, then what’s the point in reading it?” The asteroid had started spinning out of control from the counterforce of firing the arrows, so Minari kicked off of it and just floated in front of that Eternal Deity’s face.

Sariel retorted “You’ve never re-read a novel before?”

“Well yeah, the ones I wrote myself…” The skull-faced demonic angel grumbled “Ugh, which is why I made sure to lock away all the knowledge of the future that wasn’t important. Besides that, my fancy cape knows what I need to do when I go back to Arcana. Everything else should be pretty natural… Well, except this. I already know what you’re gonna ask me to do.”

“I’ll say it anyway, since your precognition is pretty dubious…” Inari Okami chortled, pointing with her supermassive right paw towards the solar system in the distance. She softly explained “Do you see that tiny pink planet over there? That’s called Lust. There’s a child there that was once one of my Kitsune, but was captured. I want you to bring him to me.”

“Coffee Cakes should never have been captured in the first place but…” Minari let out a long sigh, “Well, I wrote a lot of stories during my Worldly Tribulation and I may have accidentally killed him off to create drama. I had always planned on bringing him back later, but never got around to finishing that particular series.”

“You did what?!” The golden fox suddenly roared, sending out a cataclysmic shock wave that sent the tiny woman soaring away, until she was caught by one of those gigantic paws and nearly splattered into paste.

“A story can’t always be happy-funtimes!” Minari slowly stood upright on one of those pads, which was bigger than the pink star ‘Asura’. If Sariel wasn’t controlling her own gravity, that Worldly Deity would have died rather swiftly. After popping her broken wings back into place, the little Goddess complained “You gotta add in some fucked up shit occasionally, to keep the readers entertained. Aside from that, I might have kinda-sorta… Killed my daughter and sent her to Hell.”

“Why would you do that?!” This time Inari Okami only yelled telepathically.

After taking in a deep breath of air, from the atmosphere of Sariel’s paw, Minari started explaining herself.

“Okay so, back when I originally wrote her story, she wasn’t even related to me. But one thing led to another and I thought it would be fun to reveal that her father was actually Michael Cinagra, but well, I obviously didn’t know what I was doing back then. It wasn’t until later that I tried to write my way out of it and I ended up deciding to just force you to help me. Aside from that, it’s not really ‘me’… So she isn’t ‘my’ daughter in that sense. I created seven-hundred and seventy-seven different universes… Each one of them had a different iteration of ‘Rapture’, so I was obviously the last one. I think that at least five or six of them ended up in this particularly fucking gigantic universe, around the same time.”

“Alright, enough! I understand now…” The golden fox shook its head, then revealed “I’ve destroyed entire worlds while trying to save them. No… Not just worlds…”

“It ain’t a fucking competition!” Minari retorted, before flapping her wings and flying away from the corona of that paw. Once she was back out in ‘space’ again, she said “Anyway, let’s get back to the actual plan. You might be a Legendary Eternal Deity, but there’s basically no way for you to do anything useful in this situation. If you reveal your presence, Chaotica will come over within moments and probably destroy this entire solar system trying to eat or rape you.”

“This is true…” The vixen nodded, “Hence why I required your presence, Rapture.”

“Ugh, that’s such a stupid name. Seriously, just call me Michael, Mike or Minari.”

“Very well, Mike, hohohoho~…”

“What are you, Santa-Fox? Who the fuck laughs like that?!”

“I forgot how much of a jackass you were.”

After the two of them finished their ‘quip-off’, Minari explained “Back to the plan… So aside from the fact that you can’t even make an appearance without causing a catastrophe, the Asura System has loads of defensive measures in place. If anyone with positive Karma that isn’t an Eternal Deity comes within a few light-years of this literal hellhole, Chaotica will know. There are shittons of defensive arrays, orbital weapons, interstellar battleships, not to mention the fact that a lot of the clientele is in the Worldly Deity Realm.”

Sariel muttered “You know an awful lot about Chaotica’s Coliseum, for someone who has never been here before.”

“I wrote a whole series called Chaotica’s Coliseum and each volume took place on a different planet. So I either wrote it into existence, or the info was already in my brainbox ahead of time. That’s beside the point though. Saving Alicia should be easy. All I need to do is ‘buy’ her… But since Coffee Cakes is being used as bait to catch other Kitsune or one of your Avatars, it’ll be hard to free him without creating a bit of havoc…” Minari paused for a moment, then shrugged and continued “Then again, this is Hell. Havoc is basically the status quo.”

The giant fox asked “Do you know where he is being held?”

“If I have my timeline correct…” The tiny woman grabbed her right elbow, with her left gauntlet and placed her right hand on her chin for a few seconds. Then she answered “He should be in the arena of Lust, fighting against an army of slutty gnomes?”

“Then, what’s your plan?” Sariel patiently inquired.

“Well first of all…” Minari snickered, before growling “I’m gonna fuck some shit up!”

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  1. Pingback: HCL Chapter 115: The MC | Mike777ac

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