“Wake up! Ya damn brat, the Sun’s up and yer still sleepin!” The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was that wrinkly, yet enormous hand reaching down and grabbing my hair. He directly pulled me out of bed and threw me onto the floor, before kicking me in the side. I flew across the room and crashed into the surprisingly durable wood paneling. Continue reading
Compressing a bunch of gas in your gut is exactly as pleasant as it sounds. I couldn’t help but ask “Are you absolutely sure that I don’t need to take a shit? Cause I really don’t feel good right now… Urp~, nope, almost threw up but managed to keep it inside!” Continue reading
After Long Di stopped making a bunch of green smog swirl around him, I tried really fucking hard to ‘sense’ that Qi stuff. I mean, it was basically just mana, right? I’ve played enough video games and read enough manga to figure out that all that martial arts bullshit is pretty much magic. Unfortunately, my bladder didn’t seem to care about cultivation. “I have to piss.” Continue reading
“You keep droning on and on about these Stages, lifespans and age limits, but this is just humanity right? What about other races, like Elves, Orcs, Goblins and Dwarves or whatever else there is out there? Also, there’s probably like magical treasures that can make people live longer than normal or help them break through under circumstances where they normally wouldn’t be able to…” Continue reading
“This world’s called Genesis and it’s big… Though I ain’t never been to any other worlds, so don’t quote me on that. The Sun’s named Ra and the three moons are Khonsu, Iah and Thoth. Ya can usually only see one a night, but sometimes there are more. Hmmm~, we’re in the Qing Republic… Used to be an Empire a few years back, but that shitty old Emperor and his whole family pissed off the ancient Qing Clan. Anyway, there ain’t much different between how I was livin before then and now, so for all I know, someone else might’ve taken over in the past hundred years that I wasn’t payin attention.” Continue reading
“The Eternal Dao of Eros is the path of desire. It is among the most powerful and primal forces in existence… However, it is very easy to fall into depravity. This cultivation method is incredibly dangerous but fairly simple. Now, you shall entertain me, little serpent…” Continue reading
“Have you ever heard the saying ‘If you stay a virgin for thirty years, you can become a wizard?’ Well, I only made it to twenty, so I guess I’ll just have to give up my dreams of having magical powers. Unfortunately, no, I didn’t have sex with anyone… I died. Continue reading
Okay, so apparently, whenever I try to take a break from writing, I always end up writing like 10 times more than normal roflmao. Anyway, a few days ago I woke up and had this idea for a story: “The Dao of Eros”. Continue reading
Mike777ac 