HCOP Book 2, Chapter 91: Insanity

Alice snickered, “What the hell are you talking about? It’s just wine! I mean, it ‘is’ made from JJ’s blood and your semen… So there might be a few weird side-effects. Still, it shouldn’t be that bad, right?”

Michael complained “Ugh, no, it is definitely really bad! See! This is part of the reason why our souls are so fucked up! You can’t keep constantly impairing our judgement and sense of reality by taking all these drugs all the time! Seriously, just because our souls aren’t as fragile as real, physical bodies, doesn’t mean that they’re invincible! Don’t you think that maybe~, intentionally overdosing on weird ‘medicines’ could possibly be harmful? Or are you so addicted to… every-fucking-thing, that you can’t go five seconds without smoking, drinking, or shooting-up?”

She retorted “Nah~, I totally space it out better than that… Dude, does it even matter though? Look, maybe the reason we’re having so many problems is because you’re such a straight-edge bitch and afraid to have any sort or mind-altering, psychedelic experiences? Even Tali smokes a little Elf-Weed with me every now and then…”

Talia hurriedly explained “Elven cannabis has been known to treat a myriad of medical issues. Aside from that, it helps me relax and meditate peacefully. If you wish to blame someone for our asynchronous issues… It is clear to me that La Puta Zorra is the cause!”

The brown-skinned fox-girl glared at the High-Elf, with her brightly-glowing blue vulpine eyes. Then she barked angrily, and shouted “You’re puta! Putali!”

Michael sighed dramatically, muttering “Okay, enough, calm the fuck down… Ugh, Inari, you really do need to stop impregnating yourself and creating clones. It’s weird and probably really harmful. I mean, sure, it was cool at first, but your offspring started getting souls and went totally out of control. Also, what the hell was up with that ridiculous temporal displacement in your jungle? Were you doing that on purpose? You didn’t think that maybe accelerating things by a factor of a few hundred-thousand times might be a little excessive? No, don’t answer that… From now on, just stop.”

Hearing that, the pregnant fox-girl whimpered and gazed down at her abdomen while frowning. She began crying and suddenly plunged her clawed right hand into her belly, ripping out six fully formed kits. They appeared to be green-furred baby vixens and had already progressed past the point of being fetuses.

Elina screamed “No~! What are you doing?! Michael, make her stop right now!” Sarah and Alice started laughing hysterically, while Talia just grimaced and turned her head away.

The Nephilim yelled “Are you fucking kidding me?! Damn it Inari! I didn’t say ya had ta abort the little bastards! I just meant that ya needed ta quit purposefully impregnating yourself!”

“Nyah~! No~, JJ doesn’t like scary gory things~! Mikey~, make it go away~! Ewwie~, she’s eating her own gross dead puppies~! Make Foxy stop~!” Jasmine was crying, while watching the horrific scene through her fingers and hiding behind Sarah’s tiny back.

Michael grumbled “Ew, seriously? It’d be different if they were just nasty human babies, but they’re like puppies! No, nope, I don’t even care anymore!”

Once Inari was finished, she growled and murmured “It don’t matter… They die eventually anyways… And they taste good.”

Sarah snickered, “Yeah, I know right? Ya should’ve let me have a few too! Fuck, well, whatever…”

Alice finally stopped laughing and laid down in the middle of the group, gazing up at the Nephilim and asking “Remember that one time, when I had like eight little baby lamias? Did I ever tell you about what I did with them?”

“Yes and hell no, I don’t wanna know what kinda weird drugs ya turned em into! Also, I thought we promised never to tell the others about that?!” Michael glared at dragoness, while grabbing her snout with both hands and holding it shut.

Elina gasped, before screaming “Rachael had adorable little brothers and sisters… and you didn’t tell me?! Wait, what horrible things did you do to them?!” However, it was then that she saw something that made her mind go blank.

In Alice’s huge right hand, six tiny baby lamias suddenly appeared. Each of them had bronze skin and scales, along with crimson irises and short, curly black hair. They were all curiously looking around at the unfamiliar faces, before starting to hiss at each other and fight amongst themselves. Of course, since they were all the exact same size and strength, it was nothing more than an infantile squabble.

Within a few seconds, the seven of them became exhausted and the cat-girl finally emerged from her stupor. Her dove-like wings flapped and she soared over to the familiar children… Yet, before she had the chance to grab any of them, they all disappeared.

The dragoness chuckled, catching Elina and holding her in a tight embrace. Then Alice explained “As it turns out… I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t kill my own kids, even if they didn’t have souls yet… That’s probably why our fusion has so many problems. I was supposed to create seven extra pills that would allow our souls to meld together completely.”

Michael sighed, shook his head and said “No, you did exactly what you were meant to do… Also, Elly, the sad truth is that we can’t afford to just keep popping out babies and raising them nonstop. Every now and then is fine, but think about it rationally… Having kids isn’t a quantity over quality type of deal. The most important part is making sure that they enjoy their lives, have freedom, and don’t turn into total assholes by the time they’re adults. Inari is a terrible parent, and I’m not just talking about the fact that we watched her eat her own unborn babies a few minutes ago. She had loads of brats, then dumped them into a jungle where they were forced to eventually slaughter each other for survival. They went off and eventually formed millions of subsequent offspring, which she continued to ‘play’ with every now and then. Eventually, when I told her to kill em all, she didn’t even hesitate to exterminate her entire bloodline. Wow, now that I really think about it, I probably should have raised Inari with some sort of morality, huh?”

Sarah yelled “Yeah, yeah, we fuckin get it! You’re all shitty parents! Now get to the Umbra-damned point already!”

He retorted “Okay, now let’s move onto our little zombie-infestation problem! I’m sorry, but we need to lose all of our ‘undead-weight’ if we want to finish really cleaning up our souls.”

The little girl grumbled “You suck at making puns! Fine~! Stupid dirty cuntbags were taking up way too much space anyway! Ugh, there, are ya happy? I threw em all out!”

Michael immediately shouted “No I’m not happy! Shit! I meant to like, turn them into mana or something! Not release them into the wild! Grah~! I really need to stop getting so angry over everything, but it’s really hard when I’m surrounded by crazy people!”

Jasmine patted him on the shoulder, “Nyah~, it’s okay Mikey~, I know how you’re feeling…” She came close to his left ear and whispered “Little Chao-Chao’s been really noisy lately. It’s super hard to focus on reading manga and playing video-games… I think we might have to kill him soon.”

“JJ, we ain’t murdering your imaginary friend, or alternate personality!” Michael splashed the glass of pink Demonic Wine onto the little cat-girl’s face. However, instead of falling to the ground, it was all absorbed directly into her flesh and caused her to start growing rapidly.

Eventually, once she reached a height of three-hundred meters, she smacked her head on the ceiling and fell onto her buttocks. While she was sitting down and crying “Nyah~, it hurts~! Mikey’s so mean~! This is domestic abuse~! I want a divorce~! Meow~!”

Suddenly, she exploded into a tidal-wave of purple liquid, which engulfed her six Companions completely. In an instant, everything went back to exactly how it was when they had first gathered together.

All seven of them were sitting in a circle and Talia reached over, grabbing the glass of Demonic Wine and sent it off into her own inventory. Then she shouted “Enough of this foolishness! Puta Zorra, do not devour your own offspring! Alicia, cease your various narcotics experiments! Elina, calm yourself and do not continue with your obnoxious whining about every morally questionable action that the others make! Sarah, there is no reason for you to create such an absurd amount of necrotic puppets! Miguel, I believe that for us to truly overcome our many, nearly unresolvable issues, we must be willing to face a difficult truth… Jasmine is far too mentally unstable to ever be compatible with the rest of our souls. I vote that we either find some way to ‘cure’ her insanity, or perhaps… We may need to resort to ‘drastic measures’. Vamos a matar el coño loco.”

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2 thoughts on “HCOP Book 2, Chapter 91: Insanity

  1. Pingback: HCOP Book 2, Chapter 90: Oneness | Mike777ac

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