“Hey Mom, are you still awake? Mom?” Matthew knocked on his mother’s bedroom door a few times, but there was no response. He started to get worried and quickly opened it, yet there was no one inside the room.
Then he started to hear some noises downstairs, in the living room. He hesitated for a moment, before quietly sneaking down the stairs with a black combat shotgun in his hands. Although he had never fired a gun before and wasn’t even sure if it was loaded or not, he still felt a little less scared as he walked through the extremely dark hallway.
“Phew~, Mom, you scared me!” He finally reached the living room and saw the shadow of his mother on the wall, flickering along with the fireplace flames.
However, when his mother heard his voice, she immediately screamed “Ah~! Matty go away! Don’t come in here!”
He turned the corner of the hall and walked into the open space, squinting his eyes to barely see his mother in the distance. As he came closer, he shouted “Mom are you okay-ah~! Oh my God! What are you doing?!”
“Matty I can explain!” His mother was on the couch… Or more exactly, she was riding on top of Michael’s lap, who was also completely naked, while he sat on the brown leather sofa.
“Hahaha~! Holy shit!” The pale-skinned man wasn’t turned off and he continued thrusting upwards as he asked “Are you gonna keep watching? ‘Cause this is definitely in my top-ten favorite fantasies…”
“Unsummon!” Matt roared, as Michael disappeared into thin air and Anaishe fell down onto the couch, startled, but mostly embarrassed. She quickly grabbed the quilt next to her and covered her body with it, before Matt turned his head away and awkwardly said “Umm, I’m gonna go over there while you get dressed… But we need to talk.”
As he walked over into the kitchen, he grumbled “Fuck, fuck, shit… Why did I do that?!” Out of impulse, he had sent Michael to the graveyard, but now the two of them were totally defenseless. Thus, he was already regretting his foolish action.
Of course, there was another person who was regretting her own decisions as well. Anaishe actually started softly sobbing, as she put on her clothing and walked over to the counter. The candles in the kitchen were dim, so the mother and son could barely see each other across the counter.
Matthew eventually asked “Mom, why would you have sex with that crazy bastard?”
“He’s not crazy!” She rebuked, “What does it matter to you anyway? Michael is strong, handsome and he saved our lives on more than one occasion… I’m single and it’s been ages since the last time I actually found a man that I liked, so why should I have to feel embarrassed or ashamed for-”
“Mom stop.” Matt interrupted, then explained “Listen, I don’t care who you date or what you wanna do in your sex life. Honestly, I don’t wanna know about it at all and would prefer to pretend like this never happened… But the problem is that Michael came from a world filled with zombies. Do you get it?”
“I know that. He told me about how he was all alone in the world and thought that he would never see a ‘living’ person again. Michael might be a little ‘intense’, but he’s definitely a good person. And in our current situation, we really need someone like him to protect us! So why did you make him disappear?!”
He stared at his mother and then sighed, “That’s not the point Mom. Those zombies were infected with tiny robots called nanites. And while Michael might seem immune to it, that’s just because he’s also infected by other nanites that allow him to you know, not turn into a fucking zombie. Mom, you basically just infected yourself by having sex with him.”
Anaishe opened her mouth a few times, with her eyes so wide that the whites were practically glowing in the darkness… Then she eventually started weeping again, yelling “Are you telling me I just caught robot AIDS?! Matty, why didn’t you warn me earlier?! Oh God, please have mercy on me! I know I’ve been a bad Christian, but I don’t deserve robot AIDS!”
“Mom, stop, calm down!” Matt shouted, then he walked over to her side and placed his right hand on her left shoulder. After pulling out the Minor Qi Infusion card, he channelled the mana into her body and she instantly stopped crying. Then she closed her eyes and let out a deep breath, before slumping down onto the table and nearly falling to the floor. Fortunately, Matt caught his unconscious mother and then carried her over to the couch, laying her down gently.
“I’m sorry Mom…” He sighed, then took out the Water Qi Crystals card and was about to Summon it.
[I would suggest that you refrain from creating objects that might announce your position to any Players with magical sensitivity. Water Qi Crystals will constantly release mana-radiation, which can be picked up by certain abilities and devices. Minor Qi Infusion is not quite as dangerous, though it could also reveal your position if you are extremely unlucky.]
Matt frowned, then he pulled out another card and asked “What if I Summon them, then hide em in the magical t-shirt?”
[The Enchanted Plain White T-Shirt and Black Boxers could potentially prevent the Mana within the Water Qi Crystals from radiating out. I am slightly surprised at your ingenuity…]
He complained “I’m not an idiot, okay? Besides, it says in the description that it can protect against ghosts or whatever. It should be good enough to cover a bit of radiation.”
Just to be extra safe, he went down into the basement before Summoning the magical clothing. Then he wrapped the Water Qi Crystals card inside the t-shirt, before activating it. As for the boxers, he actually put them on while murmuring “At least now I can’t get raped by that damn ethereal dick.”
Of course, he could also just avoid Summoning it in the first place. Regardless, he was now faced with another problem, “Since the armor was made to fit Michael, there’s no way I could wear it. Even if it could fit me though, I wouldn’t be able to carry it anyway.”
He went up to the top floor, then put on some heavier clothes, a jacket and some combat boots that he found in the National Guard humvee. After that, he walked through ‘his’ bedroom, over to the sliding glass door. When Matt went outside, he shivered a bit and complained “I should’ve worn a hoodie…” His hair was extremely short and his jacket lacked a hood.
Obviously he carried a shotgun, rifle and a handgun with him as he reached the wooden railing that was in a desperate need of a paint-job. The white paint was mostly cracked and falling off everywhere, revealing the dark-brown wood underneath.
“I hope Mom’s gonna be okay.” Matt murmured to himself, as he rested his shoulders on the railing and looked down at the distant beach. The house was basically on a giant hill, which had a long red pier at the bottom. They were so high above water-level that they didn’t need to worry about flooding, even during a hurricane. Not that Maryland had hurricanes very often anyway.
As he stared at the ‘Black River’, which had chunks of ice floating around on the surface, he pulled out the last card left in his hand. The terrifying ‘Mutated Pigeons’ on the cover were shown eating the corpses of men and women. Their size in comparison to adult humans, was similar to that of an eagle or crane… Except that they were fat, grey and still appeared similar to regular pigeons for the most part.
There was suddenly a strong gust of wind and the card was ripped from his left hand. He watched it fly away and drift through the air for a few moments, before he grabbed his shotgun off the railing and started sprinting back inside the house.
“Oh fuck, oh fuck! Oh God! Shit-shit-shit~!” He closed the sliding glass door, then went farther and pulled over the curtains. Then he took out his Summoner card and watched as his Mana decreased by one point.
[Summoner: Matthew Leblanc
ID Code: Trashmob-707
Rank: Unranked
Level: 6
Experience: 3/10
Mana: 0/6
Cards: 37
Description: A Player with zero skill, but a decent amount of luck. The kind of Summoner who makes other Players want to go out of their way to kill him.]
*Coo, cou~!*
*Coo, coo, coo~!*
Their cries were deep and loud, even though they were flying fairly high in the air. Fortunately, the Mutated Pigeons didn’t seem to be interested in their Summoner at all. They were essentially just vicious wild beasts. In their initial state, they wouldn’t be hungry right away, so there was no need for them to hunt… yet.
“Thank God… Seems like they fucked off somewhere.” Matthew breathed out a sigh of relief, as he went back down to the living room and sat in the rocking chair across from his mother. The fireplace was burning brightly and he had a shotgun in his arms, preparing for the moment when someone or something would inevitably try to murder them.
After rocking for a few minutes, he closed his eyes and started sleeping again.
*Author’s Note*
I don’t know why, but this chapter made me laugh a lot when I was editing it… Like, I knew what would happen, since I wrote it, but still…
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Meh, so his is mother is a closet slut?
I am kinda wish she dies. Not worth the trouble and MC needs to grow up. Too wimpy.
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Never underestimate the charisma of a main character lmao. Seriously though, he’s supposed to be wimpy. It’s in the nature of a trash mob 😛
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Oh gods, hahahaha, mike, now you have two choices, either kill her or turn her badass, gods, so funny 😂😂
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Other choices exist lmao.
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But, but ….. Are they as funny as those two?? Hehe
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Possibly lol.
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