Chapter 200: The Long Dong Disaster

“You-you-you-you~, filthy whore! How could you do this to I, Long Xiao?! I’ll kill you, all of you!” The furious Wood-Elf’s bright-red aura of Fire suddenly erupted from his eyes, and mouth, before oscillating around his entire body.

He clenched his fists and shouted “Flaming Dragon of the Eastern Skies, Crashing Over the Southern Mountaintop, Carrying Ten-Thousand Golden Tigers Upon His Back!” as he jumped up in the air and began spinning around rapidly. Finally he yelled “Die!” and nearly delivered a fiery kick to the back of Sarah’s head.

However, at that moment, she screamed “Shut the fuck up!” and a wave of terrifying, icy mana enveloped everyone. Aside from her six Companions, everything else within a fifty-meter radius of her tiny obsidian body, was flash-frozen.

The grass, bamboo, miscellaneous insects and especially those five Wood-Elves, were instantly killed. Before the ice-sculpture managed to touch the back of Sarah’s head, Michael waved his left hand out and casually cast ‘Arcane Push’, smacking it into the distance.

After a few seconds, it smashed into the Long Dong Sect’s front gate, loudly shattering into thousands of tiny pieces. He muttered “Ugh, I feel like things are only going to get more annoying…”

Sarah immediately cast ‘Shadow Cloak’ and all seven of them seemed to fade into the dark jungle. Then she reluctantly stopped fornicating with the Nephilim and they began hastily walking up the relatively steep mountain.

Alice asked “Why don’t we just go into that weird town? I doubt that there would be anyone who could stop us.”

Michael complained “Ugh, we definitely could… but I ain’t really in the mood ta go on a killing spree right now. Besides, that little bastard was a level-thirteen Elite at rank-E. Given the xianxia-esque nature of this irritating place, there’s probably Core Disciples who are way stronger, then Elders who are stronger than them, then a ridiculously strong leader, and a bunch of overpowered ancient Protectors. Hmmm, there’s also probably some kinda giant dragon who was the founder of the Sect like a thousand years ago, and who the hell knows how strong that bastard is? Either way, it’d be better if we can just… sneak inside somehow and sell shit. Who knows, these assholes might have a teleportation device that can take us home instantly, or at least pretty damn close.”
As they were making their way up the mountain, a group of three old men were gathered before those four slowly melting ice-sculptures. Each of them had long white hair, eyebrows, fu manchu moustaches, and were wearing pure white robes. They had golden dragons embroidered on their backs, and their belts were black.

One of them stared at a frozen Inner Sect Disciple while gritting his teeth and clenching his fists. Then he turned back towards the gateway, growling “Who did this to my grandson?! Show yourselves, cowards! Do you truly dare to give I, Chu Chu, no face?!”

That old man’s green irises turned bright-orange, and a slightly Chaotic aura started to emanate from his body. Then one of the others shouted “Calm yourself! Such potent Darkness Qi… The one who did this, must have been an expert. It is likely that this is in fact, a trap! We should make haste and retreat immediately!”

The third Elder snorted, then coughed up a large amount of phlegm, and spat it onto Chu Chu’s grandson’s face. Suddenly, an extraordinarily large amount of Nature mana began entering into the ‘corpse’.

After a few seconds, the ice began to crack and a horrible scream erupted from that boy’s mouth, as he came back to life. It took a moment for him to come to his senses, and then he looked around at his frozen friends, “No! Chu Xu, Chu Bu, Chu Chong! What has happened to my brothers?! Wait, where has Long Xiao gone to? Did he defeat that barbarian?!”

Chu Chu and the other two Elders immediately grimaced, and finally the one who had resurrected Chu Lu muttered “It will take some time, but these three can be saved… Unfortunately, the damage done to the Young Master’s body-”

“Who did this?! Who was it?! Quickly child, you must inform us!” The second old man, who had golden irises, questioned that startled boy rather frantically.

However, just when he was about to answer, there was a shrill whistling sound and his head exploded. After that, there were three more blasts, obliterating the potentially resectable ice-sculptures.

It happened so quickly that even those level-thirty, rank-D, Ultra-Elite Elders were unable to determine where those ‘Arrows of Wind’ had come from. In fact, each of them were terrified, because they could instinctively tell that the sniper could have easily killed the three of them as well.

Chu Chu glared around fiercely, while the golden-eyed old man muttered “So cruel and ruthless…” They all swiftly began channeling their auras around their bodies, stealthily activating some defensive barrier spells and vigilantly awaiting an ambush that would never happen.
A whole kilometer away, Talia frowned, before glaring at the snickering Nephilim, “Miguel, you have a very disturbing sense of humor.”

Sarah grumbled “If you assholes wanna sneak around, then stop talking so fucking much. I can only make us invisible…”

The Huntress sneered, “Hmph, you act as though you are the only person amongst us, capable of stealth! In fact, even if the lot of you began screaming and shouting, it would be impossible for anyone to hear you at this moment!” Her aura was spread out and creating a thin vacuum around their whole group, so they had a soundproof barrier of sorts.

Alice was panting, as she suddenly wrapped her arms around Michael’s neck and rested her chin on the top of his head. The dragoness complained “I… hate… hiking… How much farther are we going to walk?!”

Elina was still riding on the giant green vixen, but both of them were also fairly exhausted. Inari barked a few times and then howled loudly, causing Talia to become excited. She turned towards the Nephilim and proudly announced “Our Companion seems to have discovered something interesting over there!”

Thus, they all headed through the thick bamboo, trees and foliage, to eventually reach a mysterious cave-mouth. It was just barely large enough for Alice to walk inside of, without having to crouch.

The extremely sensitive High-Elf had to stop creating a vacuum around them, so that she could hear the mana within that ominous cavern. Sarah also stopped cloaking them, since there didn’t seem to be anyone who would have been able to see them anyway. Elina had to use ‘Light Manipulation’ to prevent her body from turning into a giant glowing beacon, but she ‘illuminated’ what was in front of them.

Michael asked “Anyone wanna bet on whether it’s a Dungeon or not? I’m thinking, probably not a Raid…” as they all began walking inside. They weren’t even slightly nervous or apprehensive, because they had all died far too many times already… and Jasmine was sleeping.

Contrary to his expectations, the cave seemed fairly normal and even after traveling through the tunnels for nearly a mile, they didn’t manage to find anything interesting. Occasionally, there would be a fork, but Inari would swiftly lead them towards the ‘correct’ path. However, even when Talia asked her, the vixen wouldn’t explain exactly what was making her so excited.

Alice suddenly sniffed the air, “Ah, I get it now… Ugh, but we’re still so far away~. Mike, carry me!” When the giantess hopped onto the Nephilim’s back, she unequipped her robe and gauntlets, so that her weight would ‘only’ be around four-hundred pounds.

He sighed, continuing to trudge forward, following behind Sarah, Elina and Inari. After an hour, they finally reached a huge open area, with a myriad of constantly flowing waterfalls and plenty of brightly glowing plants. There were even a few buildings in the distance, and above them, it was possible to see the beautiful grey Moon.

They had reached the center and top of the mountain, and the moment that they took a few steps into that place, a beautiful woman suddenly appeared before them. She was two meters tall, with abnormally large breasts, long and fluffy red hair, with two triangular ears twitching around atop her head. Her pupils were vulpine, and her irises were bright-green, signifying that she was likely of the Nature Affinity. There were six bushy orange tails wagging around behind her back, and there was no clothing on her entire body.

“Meihui the Grand Matriarch, Level-32 Sextuple-Tailed Nature-Fox, Rank-C, Raid Boss,” was written above the fair-skinned girl’s head. There were also quite a few glowing green tattoos upon her chest, abdomen, arms, neck, legs and face: all of which, appeared to resemble Chinese characters.

Michael stared at her naked body for a few moments before asking “Nice ta fuckin meet ya, can we come in?”

“Arf, bark-bark, awoo~, aw~ awoo~! Yipyipyip~, gururururu~!” Was the answer he received…

15 thoughts on “Chapter 200: The Long Dong Disaster

      • Given the xianxia-esque nature of this irritating place, there’s probably Core Disciples who are way stronger, then Elders who are stronger than them, then a ridiculously strong leader, and a bunch of overpowered ancient Protectors. Hmmm, there’s also probably some kinda giant dragon who was the founder of the Sect like a thousand years ago, and who the hell knows how strong that bastard is?

        this part just awesome lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thought that sounded familiar rofl. I was like “Wait a second… I think I’ve heard that somewhere before…” Then I realized that you just forgot to use quotation marks.

        Liked by 1 person

    • We have a reincarnated OP MC with his own harem, so we’re already halfway there.
      Now, we only need some hidden cultivation scrolls and a lil’ bit more asshats. Top it off with a narrative which won’t stop repeating itself and explaining to you how strong or weak someone is, or why someone is so angry — and we’re already there.


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